The Annual Christmas Party

Oh, well, I must say, I am still hungover. The booze flowed freely and gift-wrapping was tossed in the air w/ glee. Saturday, December 15th, is a day which shall live in infamy.

First off, so many new PSU friends showed up and I was so glad that they did. Everyone seemed to mix well. Everyone thought Shannon was a hoot and a half, especially when she was frantically digging thru the coolers in search of Lone Star Beer. Marie made Mark so happy by speaking German w/ him, and Kylie charmed the whole lot. Rachel and her beau Derek win for Nicest Couple Ever. I was so happy to finally get a chance to have Aimee and Roll over. And Tana got in a wreck the night before, totaled her car, and still showed up to kick some Gift Exchange Ass.

It was also the first appearance at the Party by my new friend Lorna, who brought a Wandering Jew baby plant for me, and I was so touched! If only I can keep it alive it'll start feeling more and more like Texas around here.

This was also Melissa's first Party and she made the Best Snack Ever, Pigs in da Blanket. Those things were like crack. Nom nom nom. We also got to see Susan, after a 2-year hiatus. Yay Susan! And Mickey showed up for the first leg of the party. And Barb was totally rocking this extravagant ethnic outfit. Not only is she smart and funny and a joy to be around, she is always so visually captivating as well.

Camille and Jarvis are such good folks and I feel like I never ever never get to talk to them long enough. Of course, I was drunk off my ass, and maybe I did talk to them and sadly don't remember, but maybe one day we can talk and I'll be sober.

Clay had the most fabulous jacket, made out of 1940's couch fabric. If you rubbed it, it sounded like "Wick wick wickey, wickey wick wickey." Plus, cool Shriner's tie pin. Dan was urbane as usual, and left at midnight for another party. Hmmm. . . I am intrigued. . .

And Stephani looked fantastic. She's letting her hair grow out and it's all wavy. Lovely. We were gonna go to Crafty Wonderland the next day and load up on local-made artsy stuff like t-shirts and wallets and stuffed animals, but we were so hung over. We suck!

Wilber and Becky finally showed up. Man, I have been wanting Becks to come over forever and I hope she will come over more, now that she knows where we are. And Kyle and Wilber work together on Mondays now, so maybe we will get to see more of Wilber, too.

Gina and Arley were so funny. Aimee said later that, even though she used to live down the street from us, Party night was the first time she'd ever heard Arley talk. And he was funny! Gina made the AMAZING sign at the front door. I wanna keep it forever. She's so damn talented and she just hides her light under a bush. She also rocked her patent leather pumps.

And Wendy looked absolutely amazing, too. Look at the picture, because she had this beautiful coat on. And she had a cute lil' haircut and she's just so damn sweet. Love her! And Joseph was celebrating on Saturday. He will soon have a new job at Intel, so congrats! Beanie and tiny bebe Wyatt were w/ Grandma Della on Saturday. Beanie is a giant, almost taller than me, which ain't saying much, but still. . .she's only 8.

The best gifts were: Life-sized cutout of Bobafett, giant Beefeater gin, fun papier-maché doll, Penis Man drum, electronic keyboard, GIANT post-it notes, battery eater monster, magnet board, and that's all I remember, cuz I was way drunk. If I offend by not naming yer gift cool, it's only becuz I have diminished facilities. Please post a comment and tell what kick-ass thing you brought and I will be duly chided.

Thanks everyone! I love my friends so much and it was so fun getting to see ya all in one place!

DOGFEST 2007

These are my stinky doglings.

Trudy is the blonde at the top. She currently suffers from a Urinary Tract Infection, which is what ya get when you are low to the ground like she is. We get to spend millions of dollars at the vet tomorrow, when she goes to get x-rays to make sure she indeed does have her 2nd UTI in a month, and not something more horrible, like kidney stones.

Tuco is the short, dark and handsome boy. He is shy and doesn't like to be photographed. He's really much cuter in person. When it's time to go for a walk and I are getting ready, he'll run and get one of his gross, slobbery, matted stuffed animals and SHAKE IT. He gets so excited he just has to GET SOMETHING! Then I spin around Tuco, shaking the plastic (not yet filled with) doo doo bags and Trudy runs in circles around me, hopping every now and again. Tuco drops his filthy toy and begins to bark and pretend-snap at the doo doo bags. It's really fun.

PITFEST 2007

This is my Kyle, who is probably appalled at the revelation of my Walking Ritual with the dogs (see above.) He will be mad that I posted this picture because of his underarm hair showing, because he is modest. Look how cute he is! He is on the phone with Patrick Sheehy, an old high school buddy from Waco. Patrick used to date a girl we secretly called "Too Much Candy For a Nickel." Because she was really slutty. But, that's the way Patrick likes 'em, and you can't convince him otherwise, sadly. Aside from recent poor taste in "ladies" Patrick really is a great guy. He's tall, and tan, with dark hair and blue eyes. He's easy-going and slow to rile. He is hilarious and a talented sculptor.

HAIRFEST 2007

This is my friend Melissa, who tried to talk Patrick out of liking slutty women the night this photo was taken. Melissa says what's on her mind and takes no prisoners. She has long, gorgeous, curly brown hair which she wants to make into dreds. I know it's her life and her hair, but, c'mon now, LOOK at that beautiful cascakidading hair. It's so lovely! Melissa doesn't care what anyone thinks on the matter, which is probably why I like her so much, even tho' it means dreds. Her writing is hypnotic. Do you remember the scene in "Amelie" where she takes the old blind man by the arm and leads him to the subway station, chattering a litany of sensory impressions all the while? After that scene was over, the blind man stood on the sidewalk stunned, with vibrating curly-cues wafting off of him? That's what you feel like after Melissa reads her work to you. She weaves her story all over you and you are left stunned, letting it sink in.

CREEPFEST 2007

Oh Clay! This is my bro-in-law with his hair in a creepy chongo. Our friend Dan said the other night that it is totally fitting for Clay to have such a creepy ol' pony tail, since he is a Boomer. Still, look at that smile. That is the smile I always get when he knows he's creeping me out. When my sister and I would go on road trips when we were little and she would get Funyans & Pineapple soda & then breathe the fumes of that deadly combo on me for hours on end, she would give me the same exact smile.

Halloween!

Bugs! Since I am not in Texas anymore, I was missing bugs. Luckily I now know I am still managing to get my recommended daily allowance.

Look at My Cute Sister and Niece!

Readers Forgive me. It has been a month and 6 days since my last entry. In that time I have seen Gerard DePerdue's doopleganger on the bus, which I am beginning to think is some sort of celebrity worm hole. I also am kicking the grad school ass. I got an A+ on my first paper for Publishing.

When I was in Texas my sister Anita, my mom and myself took pix at the Wal-Marts. I just got those pix in the mail! I hate to tease, but I will have to post the pix at a later date due to no scanner at work, but I WILL post the carnage. Kyle runs around the house mocking my sad Wal-Marts photo studio pose. Mean ol' Kyle. Check out the picture above of my sister Anita and my niece Cameron at the top of this post!

Just missed Junior Brown, who played just up the road from me last night. Dang! But, don't cry for my cultural starvation. We had our Memoir Writing Group last Thursday and it was fantastic. We just got a new member, Lorna Miller, who is a Portland institution. She is a singer/songwriter and all her kids are musicians. Two are in the popular local band Lisa and Her Kin, and her oldest son is a guitarist in Austin. She wrote about her grandmother's apple tree last week and it was a tasty treat. Barbara Haga, also an accomplished writer, is in our group. This last time she wrote a funny, heart-pounding story about her son when he was younger and taking their inflatable raft out to sea in the Puget Sound. Melissa Shearer didn't get to attend this last time, but she writes layered prose honeyed w/ asides and insights. Stephani Skalak, the lovely and talented documentary film maker, had to chair her film festival, so couldn't make it this time. She writes straight-forward memoir gleaned from prompts she gets from fortune cookies. I wrote up some starts for a ditty I wanna do about my Grandma Teston. I highly recommend a writing group. If nothing else it's a dedicated excuse to get drunk w/ a bunch of people you appreciate and find funny and smart.

Lastly, I need a haircut. My gal, Lana Guerra, is in Thailand, so I am hoping for her speedy return. She is walking art. Her tattoos are like stitching, like a doll, and has long, lovely dreds. She makes huge, performance piece wigs and also performs with Circus Mundus Absurdus. Crude Things Gallery is where you can look at her work.

Hope yer weekend is good and I hope to post more soon, and on a more regular basis. Not that anyone cares, but I do really find it fun.

Short Like Me

This post will be really short because I'm exhausted, and because I am writing this on my new iMac laptop, which I haven't totally gotten the hang of yet.

But, I did not want you to think I had abandoned the blogging ship so soon. And I wanted to let you know that I did survive Texas, or what my sister Anita and I now like to call Feces Week!

Also, my celebrity sighting on the bus today was George Carlin. He looks very similar to Howard Hesseman, but I KNOW they were 2 singular people.

More after sweet slumber.

I Have Been Remiss

RIP Marvin Zindler. May you not be molested in Heaven by slime in the ice machine.

I do have my own Marvin Zindler story to share. Once when Jynnette, Andy and I were in Houston at the Burger King on Westheimer (I believe) Marvin Zindler and some buddies from the news station came in. Marvin had on a grey suit and a white shirt. He definitley had on his trademark blue specs. And he and Andy were wearing the same exact grey wingtips from Florisheim Shoes!

Ever Had a Warm Bear Claw?

Went to Last Thursday on Alberta Street last night for the art walk. It was so damn packed you could hardly move. I didn't get to see all the vendors 'cause I couldn't get close enough. Then I had a donut, or actually an apple-filled bear claw, and felt much better about the whole adventure.

Things I like about Last Thursday: 100 thousand food vendors. None of which I could bear to wait in those perpetual lines for (hence the donut) but they offer veggie fare and hot dogs and BBQ and Thai and burritos and dessert-y things and it all just smelled yummy.

I also like the street theater, although last night we were such sardines there was hardly room for the drama. But we did manage to hear one woman shout out "I'm gonna sneak in thru your back door and eat all your CORN!" Which, even tho' we weren't drunk, broke us up.

Also, I love all the little art boys selling graphic-y doodles they made on old coffee sleeves and what not. I am a sucker for graphic, b&w, cartoony stuff. I think I am biased towards old Drek-style art. And I LOVED this one guy who did all these creepy, organic, compost-y type of creatures, ink on wood. He had one w/ tentacles and a lamprey mouth. I wanted it and I let it pass thru my fingers 'cause I was broke. I'm gonna find him again!

Other cool things: Guy in fun motorized wheelchair selling poems he makes up for you. And girl playing the SAW! And there was also a gal playing the accordion. Some some lucky day I will learn how to play the accordion. I have petite accordion that I make noise on, but one day, by the grace of Gawd, I will play the accordion for real! The clown bikers were out. They usually put on some sort of show, their bikes dressed up as geese & such. This time they were jousting. They are moving, so soon we won't have a designated spot on which to watch their hijinx.

My friend Melissa saw a shooting star. I think we are about to go thru that kick-ass meteor shower that has 3 times the stars per hour as Persiad. We only go thru this shower every 40 years, so get yer butt out of the city and check it out!

In other news, I am feeling especially accomplished because I got my diploma and my first pay check in a year! I left my cush and mind-numbing office job at the local teaching hospital last year to finish up my schoolin' (I ain't foolin'.) And I just got my first paycheck at my new, cush and mind-numbing office job on PSU campus. I applied for the full-time spot here, 'cuz I am but a temp. However, they chose someone who likes accounting over me. Don't despair! A friend in the Student Activities office has optioned my services and I will not have a gap in my employment record. Whew!

Company

Well, I think Joe and Stephen are having a good time. They went to the Farmer's Market and to the Japanese Gardens on Saturday. Sauvie Island and the Vendetta for $1 Rainers on Sunday. Then Kyle and I met them at their friend Steve's place for grilled goodies and pate (can't remember my accent codes today, it's pat-TAY, not pate.) We ended up boring Steve's chicken, who went on in to bed, instead of waiting for us to drop greedily horded crumbs of delicious food, like roasted corn, brats, roasted squash, olive bread, tomatoes, cantaloupe, and a fabulous Ryan-made apple pie. And we sat snuggled up to the firepit on the deck, retelling creepy Texas stories in the crisp Portland evening.

Yesterday they went to Mississippi Street for some treats at Gravy (gravy covered fries, mmmmmm. . . ) then to Powell's Books. Then we met for dinner at Echo. They make a kick-ass blue cheese burger. The jamblaya & curried clams were good. I had steak w/ chipotle chedder mashed 'taters. Uh huh! And we had Marionberry Rickeys. Then, because we weren't disgustingly full-to-bursting yet, we went to Pix on Division and had mousse-y, carmel-y, creme brule-y treats, Kyle had basil ice cream. Then, home to laze about in a food coma.

Today, I sit again at work w/ nothing to do. Sigh. The boys are checking out the Gorge, and driving out the old Columbia Hiway, to look at waterfalls, and maybe spot a Sasquatch or two. Tonite I think Joe and Stephen are gonna check out Higgins. Then they head out to Seattle to visit w/ Stephen's fambly. It is so fun having them here! Joe's deadpan Texas delivery kills me. And Stephen has a mega-watt smile and is so nice.

Junior Year at Brazoswood Highschool

Celebrity Sightings

Well, not really. One of my Super Powers is to see folks on my bus who almost look like famous people. I have seen Kurt Vonnegut, and Kevin Kline. Yesterday I saw Howard Hesseman.

If you notice on Howard's Winkipedia page, he is from Oregon, so, maybe. . . And, if you don't love Howard as much as you should you need to check out the movie Rubin and Ed. So spectacular, and includes Crispen Glover and Karen Black, so really, you can't go wrong.

Again I am at work. One of the perks is that my office is right by the AV dorks. Right now they are pretending to be the PSU school principal & are giving fake addresses over a bad, reverb-y PA system. Oh, for a taser. . . Actually I could bring my blackjack tomorrow and just start taking those mo-fos out.

One of my good friends from my first days in college at San Marcos State University is coming to visit this weekend. We used to call him Big Joe, because he dated Little Joe, who was a good foot shorter than Big Joe. Now, w/ no Little Joe, Big Joe is again Joe. He's been in NYC, being cheffy and designing kitchens. This will be his first visit westward, so we are trying to think of all the good West Coast things for him to do. Like get his aura read. Or ride a wacky bike, like one made out of bamboo, or that reclines, or has a seat 6 feet tall. Also, eat berries and salmon and fiddle heads (except they are outta season) and have a Marionberry Ricky. Going to Mt. Hood to look for Sasquatch. Going to the coast to look for starfish. Go to the Japanese Gardens. That kinda stuff.

Awright, gotta get back to my reading. I'm learning about snake handling!

Long Overdue

Well, it has been months and months since my last post. It has taken almost that long to get signed back into this website. Memory of passwords and such are so many crepe-y cobwebs clinging to the recesses of my dessicated, tiny brain. It's a wonder I remembered I started this blog thing at all.

In the interim, in the midst of all my non-posting, we got a new dog. Trudy is a corgi-bulldog mix. Feel free to call her a Borgi or a Cog. She is squirrel-obsessed. And is also a princess who must have a bed in everyroom of the house, 'cause she has a lot of naps to take, teats-up on the puffiest pillows we can provide. She was a rescue from the little agriculture town north of us, Yakima, Washington. She's 2-years old and already had 3 litters of puppies (!) by the time we got her. She adores our other pup, Tuco, and is mesmerized by our cat Wampus. She is also staunchly protective of our godson, Ethan, and loves to lick him in the face, especially when he has something to eat.

Right now I am at work at the Campus Recreation office on Portland State University campus. I am temping, hoping to get hired in for the permanent spot. Perhaps it doesn't seem prudent to be blogging from work, however all the supervisery people left for a long weekend and didn't leave me squat to do. So, rather than craft elaborate paper-clip chains or rearrange the supply closet yet again, I choose you, Gentle Reader.

Upcoming Events:
Big Joe Visits 8/24
Pick Up My Diploma 8/29
Visit to Texas 9/13-9/17
My Birthday 9/19
School Starts 9/24
Whew!

It Ain't Snowing Here Anymore But. . .

Polydactyl cats leave strange footprints. These are from Wampus, the most shoe-sniffinist cat there is. I don't even know how he took time out of his busy shoe sniffin' schedule to leave these prints. Oh wait, yeah I do, 'cause his second most important hobby is spraying everything in our yard. I heart Wampus.

Automatic Forgiveness

For those that don't know, banana chocolate-chip muffins (or sometimes they have the tiny loaves) at Starbucks are really good. No one I know likes them. My friends say they taste like ass. But a chocolately, banana-y ass, I say. And I know I am not to be seen at Starbucks, but for a while they were the only ones up here in Portland, OR who had brewed iced tea, (not that damn soda fountain shiteous lemon mess some folks here call tea. How hard is it to brew tea? If I can do it and I fuck up toast, then tea is damn easy. Hmpf!) which is a major food group to folks from the South, so, as a displaced Texan, ya just gotta swallow yer pride and go where the tea is.